au revoir!!

a bientot, mes amis! i'll be away for the next week while in paris!!!

i'll be sure to post pictures and memories upon my arrival back in the states!

salut!

who needs therapy?

Just read and think:

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.

really?!

eyelids sweat?

we already knew!

lance....baby, sweetie, honey....

we knew....c'mon! look at your eyebrows!



but nonetheless, welcome! we're glad you've joined us!

head on! apply directly to the forehead!

head on! apply directly to the forehead! head on! apply directly to the forehead!

does this commercial bother anyone else to the great lengths it does me?! but finally, some explanation of the commercial is finally revealed here.

but if you or anyone you know has used this and it actually works...enlighten me!

tirade tuesday!

i've been wanting to vent about a few things that bother me to great lengths! i've decided that i shall have a new outlet each tuesday as i reveal my "tirade tuesday". (this great idea is taken from my favorite radio personalities on 107.9 the link in charlotte, nc - matt and ramona!)

tirade #1
large trucks and suv's driving in the city. we live in chicago people! there are no mountains. there is no rugged terrain. it's flat. it is not necessary to drive your hummer, escalade or suburban through the streets of chicago. it annoys me when i'm trying to find a parking spot and you have taken up nearly 3 spots (spots that normal sized vehicles would fit into) in order to park your huge ass army vehicle. this has bothered me for some time, but it only heightened when i saw a sad event recently unfold in front of me.

after a short summer rain, i was driving up inner drive, near north avenue. i was following a large truck (not a regular pick-up truck, but the kind where diesel fuel is required) pulling jet-skis. annoyed that i could not see around this truck, i noticed a lady coming up from the tunnels that allow pedestrians to cross lake shore. this lady was cute. she was probably in her mid-50s with her adorable pink capris and top to match. her hair was neatly done as she carried her matching purse up the stairs. all of this was shattered when the large fucking truck ran through a huge puddle and completely drenched this lady. the look on her face was devastating. she had the look as if her entire world had come crashing down. and watching her stare at the truck that sped down the street with a completely look of helplessness created a rage of vengeance against all large vehicles that unnecessarily reek havoc on our city streets! oh, and don't even get me started on their gas consumption!!!!

tirade #2
the chicago police. if there is an emergency, then it is appropriate to turn on your lights and sirens to quickly get to the accident or crime scene. quite understandable. BUT...i cannot stand it when i see a police car turn on its lights in order to just quickly get down the busy, congested street, only to turn off its lights at the corner and proceed with the rest of the traffic. is this not an abuse of power?! fuckers!

girls just wanna have fun!

finally, the closing ceremonies of the gay games came saturday! their ending means that the gaggle of gays will no longer be seen in the gayborhood or swishing their way down michigan avenue. finally, there will not be lines for the bars that stretch down city blocks only to get inside and wait 20 minutes for a drink. sure, it was great exposure for the city and an excellent location for such sporting events, but i will not miss the games.

headlining the closing ceremonies was none other than the 80s diva cyndi lauper. singing 'shine' and looking like she did when she sang 'true colors', cyndi made her way into sidetracks. that's right, along with her entourage, she sat in a semi-secluded area of the bar. the whispers were around and i made my way up towards her right away. sure enough, there she was!

word spread like wildfire through the bar and soon enough, the crowds pushed towards the corner where she sat. she waved and blew a kiss to the admiring homos! it was quite exciting!

far better than my bill rancic sighting!

bad lilly!

okay, she's damn cute, but look what she's doing with her fingers! and at such an early age...shame!
she's taking after her mother, already! :)

delish!

my morning is now incomplete without this delicious stuff! i've recently become a fan of crystal light. ever since their 'crystal light on the go', i've been hooked. i decided to try their sunrise orange this time, and boy am i glad i did! for those of you who enjoyed the yummy goodness that is tang, you will love this stuff!

gay as a bicycle basket!

i love living in chicago. summers are the best time to live in this great city. you can always count on something exciting to keep you entertained. this weekend proved to be a great chicago weekend.

friday i got to spend time with some great friends that i don't get to see everyday. we all enjoyed some wine and conversation! it was a great evening, hosted by the fabulous andrea!

saturday was the l.a.t.e. ride that i signed up months before i actually owned my new bike! i first noticed this bike event through the wonderful "chicago works" television show on public access tv. i'm addicted to it, i have no other excuse! anyway...this 25-mile trek through the north neighborhoods begins at 130 a.m. and ends as the sun rises. it begins and ends at buckingham fountain. i was getting so excited for this ride (not a race, not a race!). i had been riding up and down the lake to prepare for the much longer voyage that was to take place. after a day of running errands (and nursing a slight hangover) i didn't get too much time to rest! so at 1am we make our way to buckingham, just in time for our wave to take off! let me tell you, thousands of people riding along the same city streets. i'll admit - it was slight a cluster, but everyone was so nice (much different than the professional bikers yelling LEFT at you along the lakefront trail!). also enjoyable, were the multitude of drunk people coming out of the bars to cheer on the riders. we made our way through the course and arrived back at belmont around 430am. (since we rode down to buckingham prior, we had decided that our 25 miles would conclude at belmont instead of buckingham!) after baby powdering my ass, i crashed hard in bed!


the gay games. chicago is fortunate to be the host of gay games VII. saturday evening was the opening ceremonies at soldier field. choosing not to spend $150 on a ticket, i stayed at home and watched them on streaming video. um, glad i didn't spend (or shall i say, waste) my money on this production. okay...what homo couldn't produce a spectacular ceremony?! this was your chance! we're supposed to be known for our outlandish, dramatic productions! this, was, well...sad. granted the hot boy was roaming around the field in his tight tank top, but what was his point?! just because he wrapped himself in a rainbow flag does not mean that we get it! one gay kiss, though, to our supportive mayor. granted he has every intention to use clips from this for his 2016 olympic bid, but the man was present, cheering on the gay community!

even though the games have just started, i'm over them. but, before being completely over them, i HAD to attend the cheer and color guard exhibition at millennium park on sunday. it was great! there were six cheer squads (mad props to cheer sf and cheer ny) and a handful of color guards. R.O.T.C. chicago (righteously outrageous twirling corps) takes the gold in my book, but flaggots ohio definitely wins the award for best name! even though i drank 5 bottles of water and was sweating and burning like a mo'fo', i enjoyed the entire two hours! it definitely made me want to rush the stage and grab a rifle or flag out of some innocent homo's hands and start spinning (not twirling, people!). yes! i used to be quite good at spinning the flag. just ask my mom! she still has a few marks on the ceilings to prove it! while she may have sold my flag, i'm still tempted to join one of the two chicago groups!

a great chicago weekend! and guess what....it was essentially all free!

hi, i'm an idiot

pictures say a thousand words!

it's probably safe to say that the infant here is smarter than the idiot holding him/her!

free speech?!

so yesterday i was on a relaxing bike ride along the lake. dodging tourists, we made our way south past navy pier towards the museum campus. as we're riding, we notice a line of people along lake shore, wearing red shirts emblazoned with "CHOOSE LIFE", holding large anti-abortion posters.

i understand that in this country, we're granted free speech. but is this okay at the expense of others? these posters were grotesque and greatly disturbing. they were clearly partial-birth abortions. the pictures showed faces of fetuses being ripped by forceps and unformed faces covered with blood. while this description may sound awful, nothing compares with looking at the actual pictures.

again, i understand that these people had a "right" to stand alongside the drive, but is it fair for young children who don't understand such a concept to be exposed to this? in addition, (i do not know statistics of abortions) aren't partial-birth abortion much less common? aren't the pictures that were on public display only a rarity?

this is the "america" that i'm sick and tired of (literally). people like this make me sick. it's all about scare tactics. and now, i'm tired of keeping my mouth closed. i am also entitled to free speech.

but unlike these americans, i'm not going to voice my opinion and/or beliefs about something that does not affect me at all. sure, i wouldn't trade my sister born with downs syndrome for anything in the world (as some mothers may choose to abort an "unhealthy" child). but, the subject of abortion isn't something that i have a right to judge or voice my opinion about. i am a homosexual male that won't have to encounter abortion on a personal level.

let me continue standing on my soapbox:
i am not going to voice my opinions, standing on a street corner holding signs to disgust the masses, about something that does not affect me - i wish that others could possibly think the same way (or at least have the decency to consider it).
let's go to the popular topic of gay marriage.
IF IT DOESN'T AFFECT YOU, KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT!
most of the people that are so opposed to gay marriage are fighting for something that has NOTHING to do with them! why the fuck do you care if i choose to marry the someone as the same sex as me? just because you want to protect the "sanctity of marriage" like your president? um, divorce people? if you cared that much people, you'd ban divorce and affairs.

okay...i have to end this entry before i become too enraged.....

don't sweat the small stuff (part 2)

i received this in a forward from a friend today. i thought it was fitting for my previous post about not getting upset about small things in life....

MAYONNAISE JAR AND TWO CUPS OF COFFEE

WHEN THINGS IN YOUR LIFE SEEM ALMOST TOO MUCH TO HANDLE, WHEN 24 HOURS A DAY ARE NOT ENOUGH, REMEMBER THE MAYONNAISE JAR AND TWO CUPS OF COFFEE. A PROFESSOR STOOD BEFORE HIS PHILOSOPHY CLASS AND HAD SOME ITEMS IN FRONT OF HIM. WHEN THE CLASS BEGAN, HE WORDLESSLY PICKED UP A VERY LARGE AND EMPTY MAYONNAISE JAR AND PROCEEDED TO FILL IT WITH GOLF BALLS. HE THEN ASKED HIS STUDENTS IF THE JAR WAS FULL AND THEY AGREED THAT IT WAS. THE PROFESSOR THEN PICKED UP A BOX OF PEBBLES AND POURED THEM INTO THE JAR. HE SHOOK THE JAR LIGHTLY. THE PEBBLES ROLLED INTO THE OPEN AREAS BETWEEN THE GOLF BALLS. HE THEN ASKED THE STUDENTS AGAIN IF THE JAR WAS FULL AND AGAIN THEY AGREED THAT IT WAS. THE PROFESSOR THEN PICKED UP A BOX OF SAND AND POURED IT INTO THE JAR. OF COURSE, THE SAND FILLED UP EVERYTHING ELSE. HE ASKED ONCE MORE IF THE JAR WAS FULL AND HIS STUDENTS RESPONDED WITH A UNANIMOUS "YES." THE PROFESSOR THEN PRODUCED TWO CUPS OF COFFEE FROM UNDER THE TABLE AND POURED THE ENTIRE CONTENTS INTO THE JAR EFFECTIVELY FILLING THE EMPTY SPACE BETWEEN THE SAND. HIS STUDENTS LAUGHED ALOUD. AS THE LAUGHTER SUBSIDED THE PROFESSOR SAID, "NOW, I WANT YOU TO RECOGNIZE THE JAR AS YOUR LIFE, THE GOLF BALLS AS THE IMPORTANT ITEMS IN YOUR LIFE (YOUR FAMILY, YOUR CHILDREN, YOUR HEALTH, YOUR FRIENDS, AND YOUR FAVORITE PASSIONS) AND REALIZE THAT IF EVERYTHING ELSE IS LOST AND ONLY THEY REMAINED, YOUR LIFE WOULD STILL BE FULL. THE PEBBLES ARE THE OTHER THINGS THAT MATTER LIKE YOUR JOB, YOUR HOUSE, AND YOUR CAR. THE SAND IS EVERYTHING ELSE - THE SMALL STUFF. IF YOU PUT THE SAND INTO THE JAR FIRST, THERE IS NO ROOM FOR THE PEBBLES OR THE GOLF BALLS. THE SAME GOES FOR LIFE. IF YOU SPEND ALL YOUR TIME AND ENERGY ON THE SMALL STUFF YOU WILL NEVER HAVE ROOM FOR THE THINGS THAT ARE IMPORTANT TO YOU. PAY ATTENTION TO THE THINGS THAT ARE CRITICAL TO YOUR HAPPINESS. PLAY WITH YOUR CHILDREN. TAKE TIME TO GET MEDICAL CHECKUPS. TAKE YOUR SPOUSE OUT TO DINNER. PLAY ANOTHER 18. THERE WILL ALWAYS BE TIME TO CLEAN THE HOUSE AND FIX THE DISPOSAL. TAKE CARE OF THE GOLF BALLS FIRST - THE THINGS THAT REALLY MATTER. SET YOUR PRIORITIES - THE REST IS JUST SAND. ONE OF HIS STUDENTS RAISED HER HAND AND INQUIRED WHAT THE COFFEE REPRESENTED. THE PROFESSOR SMILED AND SAID, "I AM GLAD YOU ASKED." IT JUST GOES TO SHOW YOU THAT NO MATTER HOW FULL YOUR LIFE MAY SEEM, THERE'S ALWAYS ROOM FOR A COUPLE OF CUPS OF COFFEE WITH A FRIEND.

summer school

i laughed at the crazy thought of teaching summer school. with the sound of the cash register running through my head, along with the thought that 4 short hours each morning can't be so bad, i signed up to teach 6th grade math to a group of students hoping to make it to 7th grade.

with absolutely no break from the regular school year, i walked into the building not really knowing what to expect. the summer program was completely unorganized on all levels. "the board" (as the individuals with no faces nor names downtown are referred to) and the administration at the school really had no idea what was going to happen for six weeks. the only thing that was known was that a group of students would be showing up at the door to walk through the temporary metal detector.

now with summer school half over, i have a few observations to report:

• three-fourths of the students have absolutely no desire to be there. they could care less about attempting to learn something in order to be promoted to the next grade.
• 12 & 13 year old adolescents are horrific. they have absolutely no respect for any type of authority figure. they are completely egocentric and have no concept of anything outside their own being.
  
• students who are clueless respond in one of two ways; 1) they sit silently with their head down, hoping not to be called on, or 2) act up, making ridiculous comments to get a laugh out of their peers.
• every students owns a cell phone which will be used to text friends, ring in the middle of class, or ring to announce an event for which the alarm was set.
  
• summer school is a complete waste of time. most students will be promoted regardless of their effort or "gained" knowledge during the six weeks.
  
• parents of summer school students could care even less than they did the previous 10 months of the school year. their apparent lack of support is a contribution to their child's lack of success.

now, for some mr. hahn comments:

• "if you think you're funny, you're not. in fact, you're annoying!"
  
• "if you want to see something funny, you can come over here and i will show you your grade!"
  
• "if you don't want to be here, leave. i don't care. i'm not going to come in here and waste my time everyday. you're just wasting my time and those who actually want to go on to 7th grade!"
  
• "yeah, it will be funny when you're sitting in 6th grade again next year."
• "listen miss attitude, i just spent the last 20 minutes explaining that. i'm not going to spend my time explaining it again whenever you choose to listen." (this was accompanied by a slight roll of the head a la shanikua)
  

my motivation to get me to july 28th:

• additional paycheck
• leaving for paris on july 29th

god help me!

a truly great weekend

a few months ago, i met gary's mom. a truly great lady. i remember meeting her at the airport, where she immediately gave me a hug and made me blush by saying aloud, "he is cute!". we had a great weekend while she was here in chicago.

i couldn't wait to visit huntsburg to see where gary grew up and meet the rest of his family. while excited, i was a bit nervous. like some of my family, acceptance of two people of the same sex together is somewhat foreign and difficult to understand. most of all, i was nervous to meet chad, gary's brother.

we drove from the airport in cleveland through small towns. they looked like any small town in indiana, where i grew up. differently though, i was able to see the amish community and the buggies driving down the highways. as we pulled up to the house, i took everything in. the butterflies in my stomach seemed to move a little bit. comforting though, we were greeted at the door by nadine. like before, she gave me a big hug and told me how nice it was to see me again.

we had a great dinner and talked about various subjects. much of the conversation dealt with family members who i was to meet the next day. later, gary's brother's loud, diesel truck backed into the driveway. the first handshake of acceptance was near. when he came to the deck where we were sitting, he immediately said hello and joined the conversation and began to tell stories, which we all laughed at.

on saturday, gary took me through various towns to show me sites that he had mentioned or that might be of interest. it was so nice to sit in the passenger seat and take in northeast ohio. we returned to the house and the extended family started to show up. i was introduced to each member, one by one. no one was shy. i learned of breast reductions, uncles shitting causing a delay of arrival, and a complete divide of the sexes. this family was no different than my own! i felt completely comfortable.

the day was great! we had a great lunch (cooked by gary and i!) and enjoyed the company of everyone present. later in the evening we made a fire and sat by it, drinking miller lite out of a can. i was excited to make nadine her first s'more while the country music blared out of the pickup pulled up in the grass behind us.

only later did i hear what everyone had to say:
stacy and sherry thought i was cute
aunt claudia didn't care if it was a guy or a girl, as long as gary was happy
and chad, knowing that his father was okay with it, would be accepting of his brother's life

it was truly a great weekend. i was so happy to meet each person there. the smile on gary's face throughout the weekend allowed me to see just how much his home and family means to him. i'm glad that i was a part of the weekend. and i know that i will only continue to grow closer to this family.

july 7

july 7 has become one of those days you reflect upon each year. for the past three of them, something has happened to change my life.

july 7, 2004:
two years ago, i had just moved all my belongings from charlotte to chicago. i was so excited to be living in the city. one of the strongest reasons for my move was to be closer to my family. i knew i would be able to drive to visit them on short notice. i was aware that my grandparents were getting older, and i wanted to spend as much time with them as possible. only one week after my move, my grandmother passed away. receiving that phone call early july 7, 2004 was a shock to me. i had just recently talked to her and thought about calling her the night before. i had decided to wait though, until i was offered the position which i spoke to her about. grandma worked her miracles quickly though. later that day, i received a call and was offered the job. i miss you, grandma!

july 7, 2005:
i was so excited to finally go see london! luckily, andrea's sister and brother in law lived in a nearby suburb and offered their extra flat space to the american travelers. we were jumping from tube to tube and seeing the city. then, one night, we decided to enjoy a bit too much wine while playing games and taking pictures outside windows! we awoke late the next morning. amity was running a few minutes behind paul who was already in central london. we got a call that morning from paul, asking what was going on with the london underground. it seemed that it had been shutdown for some reason. along with all the other confused, stranded commuters, he jumped on a bus, only to be asked to evacuate it quickly. meanwhile, amity was on the southwest line headed toward waterloo station. With no buses and no underground, amity was forced to walk through central london. watching bbc news, we learned that there had been suicide bombers on london trains and they had struck several stations. we watched, remembering 9/11, the events as they unfolded. we were to go to tower of london that day and we would have been at one of those stations.

july 7, 2006:
today i celebrate the six months that gary and i have been together. it has been an amazing time for me and i look forward to what the future holds for the two of us.

july 7....A day that i will look at differently and notice the way that my life has been changed by these events....

just want to be with you, my baby!

i feel like this is the perfect time to compose this blog entry. tomorrow, july 7, i will have been in the greatest relationship for six months. i feel like, in that time, that i have changed considerably and have become whole.

to my baby:
i think back to the night that we met (again) and haven't looked back since. i knew that something special was going to come out of that encounter, even through trash cans blocking us!
in six months, we already have so many memories that we have made together.

the night we met, i remember running into andrea's room, telling her all about this fantastic guy that i met. confused as to why he pushed me into a cab, i was determined to get his number immediately. spending the entire night/morning talking was refreshing. then waking up and seeing you, knowing that you would be part of my life for a long time, was a dream come true. eating brunch with matt and christopher, laughing at your need for potassium due to your hangover, and feeling your leg touch mine were comforts i yearned for.

a week later, you travel miles to come to denver to spend just one night with me. i will never forget standing in the target parking lot, excited because you told me that you would be able to come visit. seeing the way you became so comfortable with my friends you just met, meant the world to me. packed into nick's car like sardines, listening to the ringtone you had chosen for me, and freezing at the top of the mountain are all memories i treasure. finally, asking you if you would be my boyfriend, accepting a "label", was the pivotal moment of that weekend.

and whether you or i said it first, i knew that i loved you. saying those three words felt so amazing. they were just the right thing to say to let you know just how much i cared about you. on our first month anniversary, i remember you wearing the indiana t-shirt that i gave you and then shopping for rings together. we already knew that this was the path we were headed down together.

meeting your mom was so important to me. family is a major part of my life and i couldn't wait to meet the most important family member in your life! she nearly pushed you aside to hug me, something you didn't think she would do immediately. hearing all the stories she told me about you as a young boy made me smile. nadine knew just how important i was in your life and she couldn't wait to share your younger days with me. even though she was here for only a short time, i fell in love with her. she is an amazing woman!

our cruise. our first vacation and trip together. nothing short of perfect can describe the week we had. it was just us. we had no stress, no worries, and total relaxation. to spend each and every moment with you only allowed me to fall deeper in love with you. even at that point, we discovered more and more about each other. sitting in the viking lounge, sharing stories over martinis, shedding a few tears, biking (pink baskets included) through mexico, laying next to each other, burning on the top deck, and reading the cruise compass each night before bed are all memories of that special trip!

the birth of our niece was an exciting time for both of us. we couldn't wait for her arrival, and when it happened, we were on our way to meet our adorable lilly. seeing you hold her tiny hands, feeding her, and holding her small body made my heart overflow with love for you and your caring nature. it also showed me that you were, in fact, truly part of my family.

driving to wabash for memorial day and miranda's graduation was an exciting trip. i couldn't wait to finally show you where i grew up. watching miranda walk across that stage brought a tear to both of our eyes. i couldn't wait to introduce you to the rest of my family, to show them who this amazing person in my life was. my family adored you. though weary of what my grandpa might think, he was thrilled to meet you and talk to you. i think everyone noticed how much we cared about one another and were so happy to see us together.

we spent our first pride together. it's always been such a fun time, but to spend it with the person you love and care so much about changes how you truly feel about the weekend. to have someone to share the excitement of the weekend with made it special!

i cannot wait, on our six month anniversary, to visit the place you grew up. i look forward to meeting the rest of your family. i have no doubt that they will see just how perfect we are together and just how much we mean to one another. i know it will be a great weekend!

baby, i love you. i look forward to spending the rest of my life with you and sharing many more memories together!

HAPPY SIX MONTHS!

don't sweat the small stuff

i've learned recently about a personality trait which i embody. of course, i knew that i've always had it, but it's been more prominent lately. i worry or get upset about small things way too easily. i then analyze and think about it way too much, creating a much larger demon then it was ever intended to be. then i contain it much longer than it should be. eventually, it all boils up until it explodes.

as i was told tonight, it's not worth it in the end. in the grand scheme of things, everything will be okay (or already is). somehow, i need to let go before it ever grabs ahold.

much easier said than done.

this is my new goal. i want to try to learn how to deal with things in a much easier, controlled manner. i want to be able to realistically think about the situation or matter at hand, and then react. i'm sure that i will find out that it's actually not a situation to get upset about and it will be something i can let go of immediately.

adam, don't sweat the small stuff!

to child or not to child

I was blessed to have the company of my family this weekend. I couldn't wait to see my 6-week old niece once again! I was even more excited to walk around the gayborhood with her strapped to my chest (obviously hoping for curious, yet jealous, stares from onlookers)!

Let me preface all of this to mention that I've always dreamed of having children of my own - two of them. A boy and a girl (Reid Palmer and Evelyn Jane). They would be dressed in their gap baby wear and be the envy of all the other children on the playground. Finding the love of my life to share the responsibilities of children, the thought has only intensified as of late.

So my family decided to attend Taste of Chicago (a cluster-fuck that I will avoid at all costs). Gary and I jumped at the chance to babysit our little Lilly! After a few last-minute instructions, Lilly's uncles were set to take care of their adorable niece!


As soon as the door was closed, the puckered-up lips and squinted eyes began to form. Then, a horrible sound came from my darling Lilly. The tears and cries started and failed to stop. A change of the diaper - still crying. Pats on the back while walking around - still crying. Resting on her uncle's chest - still crying. Laying alone on the couch - still crying. A small amount of water - still crying. NOTHING seemed to make her stop! I quickly passed her on to Gary where he walked around with her for over 15 minutes before she enjoyed the slight bouncing and fell asleep. It was at this point (over an hour later) that Lilly's mom decided to come back. Of course, my angelic niece was sleeping soundly only minutes before Gretchen returned.

Upon my cigarette break during the middle of all of this, I started to think: "Do I really want children of my own?" Aren't the 20 young kids I have 9 months out of the year, combined with my darling niece enough? And, without children, I can travel and enjoy the freedom that I enjoy so much!

Which quickly brings me to my next point. It was an ordeal to decide where to go and how to get there. A baby cannot ride in a cab without a car seat. A stroller on the bus or train is every passenger's nightmare. And driving and parking in the city is nothing but a headache. To go to dinner, we had to drive in two shifts and attempt to find nearby parking (luckily it wasn't too difficult). These are some of the things that I never considered!

Let me restate that I LOVE my niece so much and she is the most precious thing I have ever encountered. Nothing makes me smile more than seeing her adorable smile and cute, miniature movements! And I hesitate to use the word but....BUT, the fantasy and seemingly wonderful thing that is children is nothing more than that - an idea of seeing that little, cute face and thinking that you yearn for one of your own!

In my life, I am able to pick up and travel to any place that I choose at a moment's notice. I don't have to worry about packing enough formula or diapers for a week, or lugging the 5 bags (for the child, not for me). So at the present moment, I choose 'not to child'.

But I must say that I have a new, growing respect for parents. Their job is in no way easy! I'm proud of you, Gretchen!

Now, enjoy a couple more pictures of my adorable, precious niece Lilly!

Lilly and Uncle Adam (Lillers doesn't look too comfy, does she?!)

Lilly and Uncle Gary

She's just too damn cute for words!